This is What Emotions Look Like, Mommy

This morning I felt like I got hit by a Mack truck.  I know, original metaphor, right? (Or is that an analogy? Simply a description?  Sorry – High school English failed me.)

We had a fabulous St. Patrick’s Day dinner party that lingered until almost 3 am.  The candles and company made it elegant, the bag of recyclables we took out the next morning that looked like we had hosted our local Pi Sigma Delta chapter made it…fun. (Side note: I have no idea which fraternity or sorority that is or if it even exists so I am not making a sweeping generalization about that group of Greek coeds…just a sweeping generalization about Greek coeds in general, I suppose.)

Because our children don’t understand that there are certain mornings they should please For The Love of God SLEEP IN – and that the morning after St. Patrick’s Day tops that list – we were awake by 7 am.  I attended my first Physique 57 class with a friend at 9:45 am.  I have never felt muscles burn with that much fire or that quickly in my entire life.  Then we walked all around the city.  All day. Like, back and forth between 7th avenue and 2nd avenue.  NBD.  (I just learned what that acronym means last week.  It’s now my favorite.)

By 8 pm the ENTIRE family was asleep.  No exaggeration.  I had long ass dreams.  Long enough to actually follow an entire story line and almost make a little sense by the end.  That’s how long we got to sleep last night.

Which brings me to this morning.

You know how when you are used to getting teeny tiny crumbs of sleep and then you get a whole, like, baguette’s worth and it actually makes you MORE tired when you wake up? Yeah.  That’s how I was this morning.  I could not physically open my eyes.  I was strewn like a giant, pissy brick across our bed when Carlitos stumbled in.  I was not capable of even acknowledging he had entered the room, let alone opening my eyes, saying good morning or giving him a kiss when he crawled into our bed.

But instead of trying to give hugs and kisses and say good morning as he usual does, he did something unique this morning, too.

He started telling a story.

Once upon a time there was a boy names Carlitos.  He lived in ManHATTan. (I love how he says Manhattan.) He was really happy.  He went on vacations to see his families. Then, one day, he moved to Brooklyn and he was so, so, so sad. (Thanks, buddy. One ‘so’ would have been enough to send cracks through your mommy’s heart.  No need to add those extra two to try and crumble it.) But then he went on another vacation to Maryland and realized that he did not move that far away.  And he also got to go into ManHATTan and saw that it wasn’t so far away.  So then he was happy again. The end.

Alright, I was bone tired, but I’m not heartless.  I told him I loved his story.  And that I loved that he even thought to tell himself a story in the first place.

Thanks, mommy.  I was just telling myself a little story about moving and vacations and emotions.

Wow, Carlitos.  You are exactly right.  That is truly what that story was about.

Mommy, emotions are what your face looks like when you feel different feelings. (Again, totally right.  God, I love this kid.)  Like, this is what someone looks like when they are sad {pouty sad lip} and this is what they look like when they are happy {that horrible fake smile he obtained from his father}.

I asked him what surprised, scared and confused looked like.  He had fabulous renditions of each.

And then he just stopped and looked at me with no expression.

What emotion is this, mommy? (In all seriousness, it looked a bit like a stoned psychopath, but I didn’t think he was ready to learn of those emotional possibilities.)

Well, I guess that is neutral, Carlitos.  When you aren’t really feeling any emotion at all.

By this point, I had woken up enough to request my morning hugs, which thankfully set his face into a wide grin.

Kids learn things in the most interesting ways and at the most confounding times. Actually, that’s pretty much true of how and when they teach us stuff, too.  Who knew I would wake up this morning to such an immediate wealth of information before even opening my eyes? Not I.

Reason #987,456,391 why I am happy I have these two loud, lovey, interesting, hysterical mini beings in my home.