So, to be honest, I think we have already made our decision: Suburbs. I know, anti-climactic to tell you right away after that post title.
However, now that we have finally stopped flip-flopping (Bet you were hoping to never hear that term again after the past two Presidential Elections, right?) and decided on the suburbs, I am anxious. Mostly because many (alright, almost all) of the moms I speak to are deliberately and unwaveringly choosing to raise their kids in the city. New York City, to be exact. I clarify because let me tell you, raising kids in this city is just a tad bit different than doing it in most other cities. In ways good and bad.
After listening to ‘city moms’ I start to wonder…
Will I get bored in the suburbs? Will I start drinking Pinot Grigio like it’s water and spend my days as a hazy, ‘slurry’ version of myself? Will my kids become ignorant, unaware brats? Will I really be good enough about bringing them into the city often to enjoy cultural events and sites? Will my husband feel trapped like a little subway rat that someone caged and won’t let return to the inspiration that is the subway…er, city? (Hmmm, let me clarify that I am not intentionally referring to my husband as a ‘subway rat.’ That actually doesn’t accurately describe him at all. If anything, he is much more ‘handsome lion’. I was just running with the whole ‘trapped, mouse/rat, city/burbs’ analogy.) Will any of us be able to sleep at night without sirens, car alarms, horns honking and the variety of insane/drunk people yelling at 3 am? Will I fit in with the other suburban moms? (I can’t scrapbook to save my life, I refuse to drive anything the size of an army tank and my husband has 3 rules that I must abide by to retain his undying love and affection: Number one is NO Capri Pants. Ever.) Will my kids know how to correctly eat a slice of pizza pie? Will we all suffer from Chinese Food Delivery Withdrawal?
Will we regret it and have to come crawling back to a 3 story walk-up with our tails between our legs up all three flights?
But then there are things that excite me about moving *just outside* of the city…
Walking out my front door when we need to go somewhere. (i.e. Instead of wrangling two kids and all of their ‘stuff’ down three flights of stairs just to get outside.) Knowing that we are all breathing in somewhat cleaner air. Driving the kids to school or even walking with them, but certainly not doing the ‘subway schlep’ with a stroller every day. Hearing crickets and birds in the morning instead of trash trucks and car alarms. (Seriously, with the amount of car alarms that go off on our street you would think a car has actually being stolen at some point. Never happens. I am considering stealing one just so that I can at least feel like all of these hours of alarms have been worth something.)
And one of the main reasons I want to move just outside of Manhattan?
I know yards exist in Manhattan. I am aware. In addition, I am pretty sure miniature pet giraffes exist here. As do homes with car garages inside of them.
That doesn’t mean we can afford any of those things.
And I dream of being able to say to my boys, “Go play in the back yard! I will tell you when it’s time to come in for dinner.” Seriously, I daydream about that. (Time for a Mommy Spa-cation, perhaps?)
Thankfully, someone is doing something to help me believe that living in the suburbs really is the right choice for us: CSN Stores. I know, random. I totally haven’t mentioned this friend before. But right now, CSN Stores is my best friend and the one whispering positivity in my ear as all of my NYC Mommy Friends go on and on about how amazing it is to raise your children in the city and Why On Earth Would You Raise Them Anywhere Else?!?! The positivity they are whispering in my ear is deafening. It is in the form of a gift to me of $45 to spend on one of their hundreds (literally!) of sites where I see so many items that will make our future lives in the ‘burbs that much easier and better.
Um, for starters, have you ever been to the CSN Store that has swing sets for kids!?!? You need to go. I will wait.
So fun, right?
Sigh…I really want the Tot Town Express Train Playground. I mean, for Carlitos and Xavi, obviously. Carlitos would just about keel over if he saw that in our back yard. Choo! Choo! But I am pretty sure that is for a town park, or a school, or David Beckham’s sons or something. I’m thinking we could actually pull off something like the Chesapeake Wood Complete Swing Set, especially with this CSN Stores dinero burning a hole in my pocket. Do you see that rock climbing wall? How cool is that! Actually, now that I look closer, they even have us covered if we chicken out and stay in an apartment in the city – A folding slide! What will they think of next?
They are even thinking of my marriage and how it will fare out in the ‘burbs, what with their ‘fire pits central’ store and all. I think having a fire pit out back would help us keep our suburban marriage romantic and fresh, right?
Baby, will you put another hot dog on my stick? And pass the marshmallows, would ya?
Annie, we are here in this daydream to be romantic.
Oh, yes, the flames are lovely, too. And so seductive. I know, not everything is about food. (Just everything important, that’s all.)
Oh, who am I kidding. We all know I am not going to use this generous gift from CSN Stores to get something fun for my kids or romantic for my husband. It is totally going toward something from their ‘wine refrigerator’ store. (Yes, they have a whole store about wine refrigerators!) I shall keep a beautiful wine refrigerator in my office (That I will undoubtedly have once we are in a house, rather than an apartment. Everyone in the suburbs has an office, right? Throw a tally on the ‘Suburbs – Pros’ side of the list.) This might mean I should start buying wine that costs more than $5.99 a bottle.
Shoot. I just realized that choosing that item brings me back to one of my fears about moving to the suburbs. Oh well, I guess once I’m on my second glass I won’t remember or care why I was scared of the suburbs anyway.
***CSN Stores is compensating me with $45 to spend at their online stores. However, the views in this post and my desire to send my kids out to the backyard to play on their very own swing set while I chug white wine and get the marshmallow-roasting sticks sharpened are in no way due to their generosity. Also, please know that I am *probably* doing this all for you, my dear readers, and if that is so you will understand in due time. In due time, my sweets.***